How the soles of my feet led me straight into the counterculture

Have you ever had a reflexlogy massage? Is "massage" the right word? Treatment? Session? I dunno . . .

This afternoon, I spent one of the oddest and most interesting hours of my life.

Signs saying "Foot massage--$20 per hour" have been springing up like young weeds on the fringes of Little Saigon in the last few weeks. I'm a sucker for a good foot massage, and my feet have been hurting lately, so I finally braved it today.

Odd. Decidedly weird, bizarre, strange. I ALMOST chickened out because the vibe was a little too hippie-dippie/voodoo/edgy for super-mainstream me, but as I said, I'm a sucker for a good massage, and I knew nothing about reflexology.

Now I know a few things about reflexology:

1) It is NOT a soothing, comforting, snuggy, feel-good massage. Despite the pretty smells and the obligatory strains of "Fur Elise" and Pachelbel's "Canon," it hurts like hell while it's happening.

2) Yao Ming is moonlighting as a masseur in Orange County. Perhaps I overgeneralize, but when I enter an Asian business, I usually expect to see small-statured people. This guy, however, was ENORMOUS. And powerful. And mute. The perfect masseur, actually.

3) Reflexology hurts like hell while it's happening.

4) After the client has been tenderized, marinated, steamed and kneaded by this enormous MUTE man, the client is likely to feel tingly good and highly re-energized.

5) But it still hurts like hell while it's happening.

6) First-time reflexology clients are likely to spend several hours just after the experience "expelling toxins." This condition is amplified for those who drink a lot of water.

7) Annnnnnnnnnnddd it hurts like hell while it's happening.

But I will very definitely do it again. I feel seriously GREAT. Best small personal indulgence in several years.